I miss my country. Not the one where I was born. The one that made me feel alive for the first time.

Last night I dreamed about my old job in Australia. It's been almost 6 months since I've left, and I never knew it was possible to miss a country. Living in Korea is and has been my dream for the past 10 years and I love my new home with my husband. Not to mention I've left the country I was born in over 3 years ago and never even gave it a second thought. But Australia? Ah, I owned that place, it was part of me.

I'll include a link to my last chocolate shop vlog here, I watch it anytime I miss it

I'm not sure what it was, but I felt welcome as soon as I landed in AUS in 2019. More than that, I felt at home. I'll never forget my first day there - which was my second day since I slept through the first. It was a Sunday morning; I was on google maps trying to find where the closest supermarket was. There wasn't a soul outside. As I was approaching the market this older man was walking in my direction. We made eye contact, and he smiled at me as he passed. Instantly I felt safe, happy, and at home. I can name countless encounters such as this. The people I met there were so kind and nice, even to a stranger and foreigner like me. I'll never forget this rainy day as I was walking home from school and had to stop to dry my glasses since I forgot my umbrella. This man, possibly in his middle 60's giggled and said, "Oh yeah, this is the problem with glasses, right?". We talked for a minute waiting for the traffic light and again I felt comforted, not sure why.

Then my job. The perfect job for someone on the spectrum like me: A chocolate shop. Not many customers, usually one at a time (except for special dates like Easter/Christmas). I could spend the day listening to music, cleaning, and organizing, all things I've always loved to do. As Pewdiepie would say, my boss was like a father to me. So were my last teacher and my landlords. All of them are between 60 and 70 years old. As much as you hear about "ok boomer", they were extremely sweet and wise, I loved talking and joking with them. We all shared life stories, birthday gifts, family pictures... I still try to keep in touch as often as I have news and would love to visit them again sometime. I still text and share pictures with my PT almost daily. We have the close relationship I never had with my own mother. I miss them all dearly.

This brings me back to last night's dream. I was visiting my old job. The place was different, the chocolates were different, and the employee too. I was a little sad I couldn't find my favorite chocolate (Sunshine truffle: pineapple, rum, and coconut) and then someone comes into the shop and recognizes me. One of my regular customers came to order a box, asking me for recommendations. I started pointing out the best ones and then left as the new employee packed her box. We waved bye and I woke up. It was bittersweet and I'm a little choked up writing this.

I can't wait to go back to Brisbane to visit. I wonder if the city will have changed a lot. I hope the people won't, and my feelings neither.

Also, my vlog about leaving Australia and arriving in Korea